Monday, October 27, 2008

My political rant

I thought some of you might be interested in this email dialog I responded to. It was originally sent to me by one of my very conservative high school acquaintances and was titled “Why I’m voting Democrat (not).” I decided to create a companion piece responding to the rant about why one might choose to vote Republican. I got a kick out of doing it, and thought you all might find it entertaining. (My reponses are the ones that start with "I'm voting REPUBLICAN because.")

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I've seen never-ending welfare helpso many poor people become self-sufficient and upwardly mobile.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I don’t really like to think about people who need welfare…I lump them into a group that I deem lazy and unworthy.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because everyone knows that raisingtaxes at the top won't really hurt people's jobs at the bottom.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I am more concerned with maintaining my status and wealth than I am about thinking about the millions of people struggling to stay afloat with two and three jobs.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because Barbara Walters is my idol and so is P. Diddy.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that Sarah Palin would make a wonderful president in McCain’s absence.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because English has no place beingthe official language in America.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I can’t understand why those damn immigrants can’t seem to learn my language…I mean, don’t they offer free classes or something?
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I'd rather pay $4 for a gallon of gas than allow drilling for oil off the coasts of America.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I’d rather save my money and spend it on Starbucks or some other huge corporation than think about the long-term ramifications of off-shore drilling for marine wildlife.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I think the government will do a better job of spending my money than I could.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I am not interested in hearing about, thinking about, or talking about the needs of the 80% of Americans who struggle to make ends meet on a daily basis.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because when we pull out of Afghanistan and Iraq, I know the Islamic terrorists will stop trying to kill us because they'll think we're a good and decent country.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I believe that acting like a bully and beating up on other countries will end up working in the long run. Someday they will understand that America is always right…it will just take a few more billion dollars and a few more thousand lives.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I believe people who can't tell us if it will rain in two or three days, can now tell us the polar icecaps will disappear in ten years if I don't start riding a bicycle, build a windmill or inflate my tires to proper levels.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I basically like to trust my own intuition when it comes to issues I know nothing about. Seriously, why should I trust the work of highly educated scientists and researchers across the world who have dedicated their lives to studying these phenomena? They’re all conspiring to cramp my lifestyle.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because it's alright to kill millions of babies as long as we keep violent, convicted murderers on death row alive.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I can’t imagine why a woman might choose to have an abortion, what with all of abstinence education we provide in our high schools. I mean, I never got pregnant/got someone pregnant when I didn’t mean to. Don’t these people know about birth control? Also, I feel like if a person is convicted of a crime so serious that they’ve been sent to “death row,” there is absolutely no chance that they could have been wrongly convicted. Besides, it’s clear that people who commit crimes can never change or benefit from rehabilitation. I know, not because I’ve worked in this area, but again because of my intuition.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I believe businesses in America should not beallowed to make profits. Businesses should just break even and give the rest to the government so politicians and bureaucrats can redistribute the money the way they think it should be redistributed.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I believe that I should be able to ride on the coattails of my father, and my father’s father, so that I, John/Jane Doe III, will be even wealthier and more powerful than previous generations. This is the way things work, and who am I to think about the unearned privileges that I have related to class, not to mention the color of my skin?
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I believe guns, and not the people misusing them, are the cause of crimes and killings.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I enjoy shooting deer/dove/skeet at my family’s ranch/deer lease, and I believe that enforcing stricter gun laws might somehow threaten my right to have a rifle. I choose to ignore the fact that the gun laws that have been proposed have nothing to do with me or any of the guns that I choose to carry.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because oil companies' 5% profit on a gallon of gas are obscene, but government taxes of 18% on the same gallon of gas are just fine.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think it is great that Exxon Mobil’s profits continue to set new records each month. Good for them! And good for me, I hold their stock!

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I believe three or four elitist liberals should rewrite the Constitution every few months to suit some fringe element that could never gettheir agenda past voters.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I believe that conservative Republicans are morally superior to Democrats in Congress, and never request addendums to bills designed to benefit their local constituents.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because illegal aliens are not criminals, are not sucking up resources through government aid, hospital services, education, or social services, but are just people trying to make a better life by coming to America illegally. We can'tblame them for that, can we?
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that God arranged for me to be born in America, at this time, with my skin color, into my family of privilege, because I am especially deserving and in most, if not all ways, superior to people who were born in other countries, especially Mexico. If I were born in Mexico and could not feed, care for, protect, or educate my children, I would not do everything possible to work as hard as I could to provide for my family. But that would never happen to me anyway.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because the same teacher that didn't teach my child to read can reasonably educate them about sex.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that abstinence is the best choice for everyone before they are married in a heterosexual, church sanctioned marriage. I feel so strongly about this that I don’t think that high school students should ever learn about condoms or birth control pills. If we talk about these things, kids might actually think about having sex. As it is now, they don’t really even think about it until marriage.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because my trial lawyer's crippling multi-million dollar lawsuits against doctors, hospitals, drug companies, and HMO's will make health insurance and medicine much more affordable.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that doctors, hospitals, drug companies, and HMO’s always have my best interests at the forefront, and are more concerned with my health and well being than lining their pockets with my money.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because Al Sharpton, Louis Farrakhan, and Jesse Jackson will end racism once and for all.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that racism is a thing of the past, and I don’t really like to talk about it. Even though I can count the number of token friends of color I have on one hand, I am “color-blind,” and think people should just get over it.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because Christians in the Republican Party are intolerant, theocratic warmongers and atheists like William Ayers have never hurt anybody.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I am a Christian, and I believe that not only am I on the only ‘right’ path, I also have an uncanny ability to make moral judgments about others, especially if they are on the ‘wrong path.’ When people accuse me of being intolerant, I just remind myself that it’s because they haven’t ‘discovered’ Christ, and ignore them.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT so that no family member of mine will die in a hospital bed. They will still be waiting in line for Obama's socialized medicine, so they will never actually make it into a hospital bed.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I feel like my health insurance will cover my family’s health care needs adequately, provided that I maintain my current employment and have no pre-existing conditions. As for the 47 million Americans who are currently uninsured, that is not my problem.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I like eminent domain and big business and government kicking me out of my home and taking my land.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I never use roads, bridges, parks, and schools and I feel like these should be built on someone else’s land that is most importantly, not mine.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because skin color and good oratoryskills are more important than judgment and experience.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that being above all else, being a P.O.W. inherently qualifies a person to be President of the United States.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because protecting barren wastelandis more important than energy independence.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I am concerned with the here and now, and am not worried that by destroying the ever-shrinking untouched landscapes and natural environments we are doing irrevocable damage to our land and other natural resources for future generations.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because my college professor told me that America is evil and should give up its place in the world.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I feel that America is better than any other country. No other country is as deserving as America to take from others, because our country is simply the best. I know this because I spent a semester abroad during college in Spain/England/Italy and got to see how much better America is.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I believe that everyone isessentially good -- even people like Ahmadinejad who call for the destruction of Israel. He just needs a little understanding.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I believe that in general, people that look like me, talk like me, and believe the same things that I do are good people. Others are difficult to work with and are often not worth the effort.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because we should all be forced to drive ugly cars with the horsepower of a riding lawnmower.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I don’t want anyone cramping my style and suggesting that I might do anything more for the environment than occasionally throw my cans in the recycling bin that my community gave me for free and picks up every week. If this is inconvenient, it’s really not worth the hassle.

I am voting DEMOCRAT because I believe in change; although I don't know WHAT the change will be, or HOW it will happen, AND I am pretty sure that I won't WANT toactually change anything I do, but still....I believe in change.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I want everything to stay the same.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because the government knows how toraise children better than parents do.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because the government is EVIL and wants to take all of my THINGS away. They also want to raise my children, I guess.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I want the rich to work harder, give me their money, and pay for my services so I don't have to.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I believe that if people would just ‘pull themselves up by their bootstraps’ and work harder, they would end up having enough money. People that aren’t able to make it financially are simply lazy or morally bankrupt.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I don't give to charity or do volunteer work and then I complain about how selfish everyone else is.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I give just enough of my money each year to help me out when tax season comes along. This is my primary motivation for donating my money to charity. I also attend benefits and fundraisers that allow me to rub shoulders with my community’s elite set, which makes me feel all warm inside while also not forcing me to get my hands dirty.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I'm not driven enough to realize my dreams without the government holding my hand the entire way.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I can’t figure out how some people can’t pay for college or to buy their first home. Don’t most people have a trust fund or at least have some kind of nest egg when they graduate from high school?
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I want America to be Europe's prosthetic limb.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I want everyone to realize that America is superior to all other countries, and if I keep telling them that, someday they will actually listen.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I think we all should be equal...equally unhappy and unsuccessful.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that things are pretty good the way they are. Even though 80% of the nation’s wealth is held by 20% of our population, I think this is okay because it works well for me and my family.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because life just isn't fair and I deserve what other people have without working for it.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that I’ve earned everything that I have in my life through hard work and dedication. People that don’t have what I have just haven’t tried as hard as I have.

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I like hearing the word "Change" 50 million times in presidential debate,seeing the word on celebrities' t-shirts and bags, onsigns outside of million dollar houses, and know that the only change that is going to happen is that I'm going to work 40 hours a week and not even see a penny of my paycheckbecause taxes will go through the roof!!! YAY!!!!
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I enjoy hearing about being a prisoner of war every chance I get. I also like to think about the word ‘maverick,’ and how much I want things to stay the same.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because Barack Obama is better than you, and he knows it!
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I can understand how John McCain couldn’t remember how many houses he owned. Hell, sometimes I have trouble remembering, too. There’s the lake house, the ranch, the cabin in Aspen, the family homestead…

I'm voting DEMOCRAT because Obama was endorsed by Hamas and terrorists endorsements are a must to achieve world peace.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I heard on FOX news that Hamas endorsed Obama, even though every other reputable news source has disputed this. Everyone knows that FOX is ‘fair and balanced,’ so I watch it religiously and take it at face value.

I’m voting DEMOCRAT since I believe those who are lazy, druggies, high school drop outs, etc. should be entitled to the money I wake up every morning and work my ass off to make!

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that everyone who is not as ‘successful’ as I am is lazy, on drugs, or a high school dropout. I like to think in black and white because it makes it easier to make these judgments about others who are different and thus, less worthy than I am.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because for some reason "change, change, change" the mantra for the Obama, since he won't explain what 'change' is...I guess he's asking for parking meter fare?...I have three quarters in my wallet.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I think that a better mantra than “Change, change, change” is “Drill, baby, Drill!”
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because "Hillary said so"

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because ‘W’ is voting Republican, and he is my hero.I'm voting DEMOCRAT because communist economics always work. Look how well off the Soviet Union is right now. That wall in Berlin has never looked better.
I’m voting REPUBLICAN because I hate communism, even though during the past seven years I have supported unprovoked foreign wars, centralized government authority, and numerous acts that have invaded personal privacy in the name of ‘national security.
I'm voting DEMOCRAT because I agree with Joe Biden, that it really is patriotic to pay more taxes. So I'm going to pay a "direct tax." Instead of wasting time giving it to the government for redistribution, I will give my money to derelicts who loiter outside of liquor stores and methadone clinics. That's where it ends up anyway.

I’m voting REPUBLICAN because it is better to pat myself on the back for the incredible job I’ve done in my life so far. I don’t want anyone to screw that up for me. So instead of really thinking about the issues faced by other people who are not as fortunate, blessed, or privileged as I am, I choose to reject the concept of “change,” and hold on to my security blanket of the status quo.

Sunday, October 19, 2008


I am not a fan of cats. In my experience, cats are sneaky if not downright mean. You can't guess what's going on in their heads like you can with dogs. For example, when I look at Mabel at any given moment, I can tell you exactly what she's thinking. Granted, though she has quite a large head, I don't know that her brain is technically filling up all of that space. Her typical thoughts include: "I wish 'mom or dad' would let me sit in their lap; I am hungry; I am tired; I wish that bee would stop buzzing around my face...OUCH!; and, Who is this friend pulling up in the driveway?"

But enough about Mabel's thoughts...back to cats. So, we have a HORRIBLE mouse problem, and after seemingly endless attempts at outsmarting them with traps, poisons, and high tech gizmos, we decided that we needed a cat to help us out. Being the Craigslist fanatic that I am, I posted a want ad on Craigslist for a "barn cat." Within an hour, I had ten emails from people trying to get rid of their unwanted cats, confirming my feeling that cats suck. One lady, I'll call her "crazy cat lady," actually brought two of her cats out here in her 1985 Buick all the way from Carollton, which is about an hour away. She must have really wanted to get rid of them.

Umm. They are pretty mean. They might look cute and innocent in the picture, but if you walk within about 6 feet of them, they literally go beserk and hiss and jump around like they want to claw your eyes out. What a lovely addition to the farm. When I went outside this morning, they had disappeared, having magically escaped from the makeshift jail we were using for them to "adjust" to their new home. Turns out they've decided to hunker down in the chicken coop, much to the ladies' horror. When we went in to collect the eggs tonight, both cats were in the coop, and the chickens refused to come inside. We decided it was not a battle worth fighting tonight, so for now the cats are ruling the roost, so to speak.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

More Baby Clothes

Two more outfits I made tonight. They are so easy and so much fun! I can't wait to have someone to put them on! :)

Monday, October 13, 2008

Making Baby Clothes-1st Attempt

I found this GREAT website,, and I LOVE it. It has all of these great free patterns for making handmade toys, clothes, etc., etc. and all of it is super easy. I literally spent 2 hours pouring over everything when I first found it. Tonight I made my first baby pants, and they actually turned out really cute, surprisingly. I even made a matching onesie to complete the "outfit."

Another thing I made from the site were a couple of baby dolls. They turned out really cute also, but unfortunately Roscoe thought that I made them for him, and he decided to taste them a bit. So they are currently in the intensive care unit (read: sewing basket) patiently awaiting repair.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Neat flower

So, we've been a bit distracted lately due to our big news, but we actually have been working pretty hard on the farm and house now that the weather's been nice and not so ridiculously hot. We were out working in the garden the other day--right now we have tomatoes, squash, and cantalopes (sp?) hanging on, and the coolest flower had popped up in the bed:

It is apparently called a spider lily, and we have no idea where it came from. It left just about as quickly as it appeared, but it was nice for the two days that it lasted.

The animals are doing well, no tragedies to report lately save for a frog that recently met his demise in the chicken coop. Apparently the "ladies" were not too fond of their reptilian visitor. Hmm...

The goats are still my favorite. They are sooo personable and have such great little personalities. They are a lot like dogs. Here is Lenny tasting my shoe the other day:

How cliche, I know. I also snapped a good photo of Otis the llama the other day. That's it for now!

We're Adopting a Baby!

We are sooooooo excited to announce that we are adopting a baby! We don't know the gender yet, but the due date is March 16th. The birth mom lives in Mississippi. It's an open adoption, so even now we talk on the phone with the birth mom about once every couple of weeks to touch base. It's been great so far.

So, I've been doing some hard core nesting. It has been so much fun to finally be able to say that we are actually going to have a baby. Here are some pics of some of the stuff I've been working on so far: